—«
1. • selfish song »—
i’m moody •
i’m jealous • even a little bit reckless • i’m
bitchy • i'm needy • you already know i'm greedy •
and i'm fearless • i'm freaky • you know i can be
real kinky • i'm flirty • i'm giving • but don't
ask me to stop living • cuz you knew who i was when we met
and i have no regrets for being this way • and you think
that i won't compromise but i'm tired of all the lies that i'm
living each day • and you think i don't know who i am but
you wouldn't give a damn even if i did know • i just want
to live my life and i know what's right for me so just let it
go • you don't have to understand just let me be who i am
• you don't have to agree just let me be me • you
don't have to compromise if you just realize • you don't
have to sing along • this is my selfish song • i'm
loud and outspoken • my spirit can never be broken •
i'm loaded with amo • so you'd better put on your camo •
i'm very outrageous • my sex is a little contagious •
and you love it you know it • so you'd better not blow it
•
—« 2. •
cinderella's lament (is it midnight yet?) »—
i've been trapped by you
for a long time now • and i've been wondering what the hell
is wrong with me • and all my friends keep asking who what
when where and how • cuz this is not the way i intended
to be • i still read fairy tales • i believe they're
true • i should've read more carefully and seen that none
of them included you • is it midnight yet cuz i wanna ditch
this party • and the pumpkin sounds like a pretty good excuse
to me • don't even bother bringing me my glass slipper •
we'll just consider that your souvenir of me • just a couple
of questions i would like to ask you • problem is i can
never seem to get you alone • plebian masses at your next
rendezvous • if they do a trick maybe you'll throw them
a bone • we were a fairy tale • a dream come true
• but i've got a new ending: "bitterly ever after you"
• is it midnight yet cuz i wanna ditch this party •
and i'm tired of waltzing with pseudo-royalty • don't even
bother bringing me my glass slipper • we'll just consider
that your souvenir of me • my life's no fairy tale •
and obviously neither are you • you make me regret that
i ever tried on that shoe •
—« 3. •
streets of new york city »—
sometimes my life is a
fairy tale and i'm waiting for my rescue in the end • i
sit here locked in the highest room with this folklore as my only
friend • sometimes my life isn’t all that bad but
i can’t help feeling that i deserve more • and so
i wait as time moves on hoping that fate has something else in
store • and i think about the time we met in the streets
of new york city • and the moment you left your mark upon
my face • and the things you wrote, the words i said, the
thoughts still running through my head • are things my mind
cannot just erase • sometimes fate takes it sweet time to
lift the veil off of our eyes and show its plan • and so
we go on with our own lives never knowing fate has lent a helping
hand • sometimes i think of what you’d be like holding
me so close as rain begins to fall • and then i stop before
it gets too far because i know these things won’t happen
at all • but i want to tell the world how we met in the
streets of new york city • and how you left your blue markings
upon my face • and the way we kept in contact across the
country for the past 6 years • and finally got brought back
together by fate • sometimes my life doesn’t seem
fair but it’s the only one i’ve got to live so i’ll
get through • i sit here still knowing i’m okay but
i’d rather live my life if i’m with you • so
i dream we’ll meet again in the streets of new york city
• and maybe this time you will dare to kiss my face •
and we can share our dreams, our hopes, our lives • and
we can share the story of how our destined love was all mapped
out by fate •
—« 4. •
untitled #3 »—
when you see me walking
down the street don’t bother saying “hi” •
i won’t have time to meet & greet but you’ll have
time to lie • so don’t you fall down at my feet cuz
i will walk on by • i might not even notice you and step
upon your pride •
—« 5. •
salvation »—
when you hold my hand i’m
still able to fall • maybe i should get a safety net and
then i won’t even need you at all • when i hold my
tongue i still have something to say • maybe i should try
to let it slide until a little attention is paid • then
you say • “hold on it’s not me that loves living
in misery • don’t you point the finger at me •
i’m not the one with endless needs • don’t bring
up the past, it’s history • just cuz i cut you doesn’t
mean you have to bleed • it’s you who always leaves
• so why do you always have to do this to me” •
don’t say that you can save my soul • salvation is
one thing you don’t know • you cannot barter what
you’ve sold • if you don’t know what to believe
maybe it’s best if i leave • when you hold too tight
it feels quite the same • i told you to get a grip and i
guess this is it so i must be the one to blame • when i
hold it in that’s when i start to fight • i guess
it’s just me that’s tired of pulling teeth but i know
that one day you’ll bite • should i recommit or be
committed • like haley’s comet i keep coming round
again • and now i say • hold on it’s you not
me that loves living in misery • don’t you turn that
finger back on me • i can’t help having basic needs
• i bring up the past cuz it hurts me • i’m
human so cuts do make me bleed • if you didn’t fuck
up i wouldn’t have to leave • that’s why i always
do this to me •
—« 6. •
crumble »—
it's been 4 hours and 5
days since you looked at me that way • i can only think
of so many words to ask you to stay • and i don't know what
i'd do if i were in your shoes • so i step out of the shower
and into my solitude • just like a boat that is not grounded
to its dock • i gently, silently begin floating in the dark
• and i wonder if by chance i'll find my way back home •
or should i learn to be content to live alone • i don't
want to live alone • and we stumble in the dark •
as we fumble for the light-switch • our lips mumble "i
love yous" • as our passion crumbles to the floor •
i guess i fooled myself to think things would stay the same •
but I'll cut myself some slack cuz i'm new to this game •
and maybe all we need is a little bit of time • but as for
now you've got your vice and i've got mine • oh, and i'm
loving mine •
—« 7. •
you from here »—
if you stand real still
they won’t even see you • if you don’t move
a muscle they won’t even hear you breathe • that’s
what it’s like to be me • if you wish real hard and
toss in a penny you’ll be once cent poorer and wishing you
had it back • but he’s not coming back • and
i don’t know where we are or who we are or why we are but
• i can see you from here • wondering if you can see
the dark side of me that i’ve been hiding from • baby
don’t look down cuz i’m getting dizzy and i might
need you to carry me home tonight • i never learned how
to fly • i could drown this time while listening to jenny
• we could paint this town but we’ve only got black
and grey • i think i died today •
